


A Test Of The Soul

by Yamiyoru



Series: The Test [3]
Category: Persona 4, Persona Series
Genre: Alpha/Alpha, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe, Discussion of Abortion, Heavy Angst, LGBTQ Themes, M/M, Mpreg, Risks of abortion, Scents & Smells
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-19
Updated: 2017-08-19
Packaged: 2018-12-17 06:55:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,562
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11846289
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yamiyoru/pseuds/Yamiyoru
Summary: Yosuke is pregnant with Souji's babies. He wants Souji to stop joking around and listens to what he has to say.Disclaimer: I don’t own Persona.





	A Test Of The Soul

**Author's Note:**

> And I’m back to writing angst again. I can only say, ‘if it’s written by me, don’t expect otherwise.’

**A Test Of The Soul**

‘Seta Souji, now you’ve really done it!’ Yosuke exclaims exasperatedly. 

His fucking-moron-as-a-mate practically broadcasted the news before he even gets a chance to talk about it. 

“Which part of ‘there’s something I need to discuss with you’ is missing from the sentence? The ‘first’?!” 

‘I really don’t understand why you’re this upset.’ 

What a convenient excuse. 

_Just say you don’t understand and the whole world forgives you._

Yosuke drops his head and buries his face in his arms. 

‘If I knew it’s gonna come to this, I would have made you wear a condom.’ 

Muttering miserably, the brunette is close to crying.

‘It feels better without it. And you like it raw too.’

‘Argh!’

This insensitive asshole!

‘Shut up!’

Yosuke’s fully merited agitation climbs monumentally and bangs his fist onto the table a little too harshly for Souji’s comfort. 

‘Seriously, why are you so angry? I thought you like children.’

Yes. Yosuke has always liked children and wanting to help those little things grow up in this world is one of the brunette’s motivations in his field of work. Souji too remembers seeing the fondness in his mate’s eyes whenever they walk past a playground with screaming kids. Who smiles fondly at screaming kids? A telling question about Yosuke’s stand towards those tiny men. 

And now? Yosuke doesn’t seem too pleased about their own, which is puzzling to Souji. 

‘Don’t tell me that photo is a prank for April Fools’ Day. Then, might I remind you that you’re 2 months late, it’s already Summer. Or it’s 10 months early for the next one? You need half a year to prepare for a joke? I thought I have a slow day at work but apparently, your day is even slower.’ 

‘You think this is a joke?! I swear I’m going to kill you one day, Souji.’ 

‘You might need to queue up. I believe first in line is Kanji.’

That aggressiveness, increasing snappy reactions, wanting to kill their husband….Normal. They’re all symptoms of pregnancy he has heard. Namely the last one, when the Mother’s heavy with a bloated tummy paired with morning sickness, his friends had complained to him their mates tried to choke them. 

Then, Souji paused. Unless….

‘You impregnated someone?’ 

‘I’m really going to kill you. Fuck you.’ Yosuke grits his teeth like a provoked animal and gift him the finger. 

Oh, that’s so bad for prenatal education and Souji sat back unamused. Do they have to do this? In his mind, he would rather be outside buying books about their coming babies and not here talking about why he shouldn’t have let anyone know. Neither is this getting remotely anywhere nor is the anger going to be good for the Mother sitting right opposite him.

‘Then, explain to me. I really don’t see the issue here. Everyone will know. Eventually. When the babies pop out.’ 

Easy for him to say and Yosuke sighs deeply at Souji’s optimistic outlook to life. How on earth is this man missing the point escapes him and Yosuke is tempted to throw his hands into the air dramatically but he resists, opting to prod the other into the correct direction.

“Does it not bother you that a Alpha is pregnant?’ 

‘..........I believe in the wonders and miracles of Mother Nature.’ Souji said all that while averting his gaze because well...there are some unusual traits about Yosuke that previously, Souji didn’t put too much thoughts in them. Such as the sweet scent Yosuke gives off irregularly, or those needy nights when he couldn’t seem to satisfy Yosuke. Which he had pushed out of his mind as in the end, he got his fair share of sexual pleasure out of it and Souji left it at that. 

‘Right. Look me in the eye when you say that.’

What Yosuke said. Frankly, he didn’t believe himself either. Souji’s a doctor. The last thing he should be doing is rely on miracles but it’s certainly odd Yosuke’s pregnant as the ability to conceive is not a part of a Alpha’s anatomy. 

Thus, Yosuke’s right to be concerned as things are different if the Alpha’s pregnant. It’s not simple as well as his nose knows Yosuke’s an Alpha and the best Souji can come up with is - ‘If you must have a reason, I have heard of people pretending to be Alpha by masking their scent and so on.’ - Terrible effort. 

‘You think I’m a Omega.’ 

‘Theoretically speaking, that’s the most logical explanation.’

‘I’m a Alpha.’ 

‘I know.’ 

The words are firm but Yosuke’s voice wanders, sounding none too assured with Souji’s answer, or his own. And Souji spent the next 20 seconds watching the hazel eyes run the rim of the glass of water.

‘.....mostly.’ 

Yosuke at last spoke but he did not catch that. 

‘Again?’ 

‘I said…’ Yosuke looks into Souji’s eyes for assurance that he has the other’s attention before repeating, ‘I’m mostly Alpha…’ 

‘.......’

_Mostly…_

‘What?’

Souji’s brows squeezes into a frown. 

‘What do you mean by “mostly”? That you’re mostly Alpha and something el.se...oh.’ 

The sudden revelation is really a big ‘Oh’ with a little ‘really?’ at the back. What a contradicting outcome to his belief as this is the wonders of Mother Nature that Souji spoke of, leaving the man slightly in awe. For Yosuke isn’t only Alpha, he’s more and in terms of numbers, even the rare Omegas pales in comparison to this fourth group that Yosuke is in. And Souji’s intrigued, to which, the surgeon responds by eyeing his mate up and down. 

‘Hey! I’m not a lab frog!’ 

Yosuke instinctively moves back in the chair, hugging his chest and stomach, curling up defensively. 

_Does he know he’s doing it subconsciously?_

Souji smirks at Yosuke’s reflex reaction. Another few months down, his mate might become even more protective than this.

The happiness is short lived as Souji, at long last, comprehended where Yosuke’s coming at and what the brunette intends to discuss. He sits up from the seat and places his arms squarely on the table. His expression is one which he wears at work everyday and it works to disperse the teasing atmosphere quickly as this is no laughing matter. 

‘What are the complications?’ 

He may not be familiar in this area of expertise but he had come across this in the books once or twice to know a little as Souji recaps his limited knowledge. 

One - The chances of Yosuke getting pregnant is higher than zero but it’s still difficult for them to conceive. 

Two - Usually even if they did, the reproductive organs may not be well developed enough to support a growing fetus. And if Yosuke have been on hormone therapy, the organs would have undergone even more changes. 

Three - To force against Nature may end up jeopardizing Yosuke’s own biological system and the worst case scenario, the brunette’s life.

At that, Souji has more or less made his own decision and his heart sinks at the possibility. It all depends on what else Yosuke can present at the table.

‘I don’t know yet. There’re more check up to do before I have an answer. I myself have never handle one before to know for sure.’ 

‘Will they survive?’

‘The babies are healthy at the moment.’ 

‘How old?’ 

‘16 weeks.’ 

Already 16 weeks..maybe there’s still hope and Souji’s spirit lifts to manage a small smile. 

_Hold on. 16 weeks…_

Which drops when Souji’s gaze falls on Yosuke’s closer-to-flat tummy and he continues staring. Long, unwavering stare, enough for the other to feel uncomfortable, who shifts uneasily and pulls at his shirt, making the bump seems even less visible. 

_They are too small to be 16 weeks._

If that is the size of the brunette’s belly, it’s quite obvious to Souji the babies aren’t growing. At least, not at the normal rate they are required to. In his professional opinion, the babies’ survivability isn’t too high. 

And between them, Yosuke being the other’s the obstetrician of the two, would know it better than him so Souji’s gaze moves up to those honey eyes, which are avoiding his. 

_Is Yosuke lying to him that the babies are fine?_

Souji too want to believe otherwise, that his mate is speaking the truth but this is Yosuke they are talking to. He waited for his partner to elaborate but nothing came. 

After getting the message Yosuke isn’t going to, Souji offers, ‘your tummy doesn’t look like you’re in your 16 weeks. To be on the safe side, let’s move the check up forward and I’m coming too. I want to know.’

Yosuke’s previously calm demeanor crumbles upon hearing Souji’s proposal and indifference freezes in place but his nose knows. Souji knows the brunette is hiding something from him as he picks out the thickening tension in the air.

‘No. No. It’s fine. I got it covered. My colleague is more than capable to handle my case.’

 _He doesn’t want me to go. Why?_

That Souji has no confidence in Yosuke’s ability to take care of himself? Or he’s offended Souji treating him like he did not know his job? About pregnancy? Still, he presses on. 

‘Who? If they are available, let’s talk to him or her tomorrow. When’s their shift?’ 

‘Eh….’

‘Well?’ 

‘I don’t have their contact now.’

‘.........’

The more Souji push for it, the more cracks show and Yosuke’s getting increasingly nervous from his scent. 

‘What’s their name then? I’m sure the hospital list their numbers down on the web.’ 

Everything seemed off. 

‘Uhm...it’s Doctor eh….eh...The web is down for maintenance!’

‘Then, let’s walk in. I can take the time off.’ 

‘They are on holidays.’ 

It is clear by now that Yosuke is just stalling but Souji has to push on with this conversation. He must know. 

‘In that case, let’s go to a doctor in another hospital—

Souji is interrupted by Yosuke slamming his fist on the table for a second time. He looks into the brunette’s frustrated expression, beaming his hardest to keep emotions in check. And Souji reaches over to place his hand gently over the clenched fist, which refuses to loosen at his touch and pulls out of his grip. 

Holding his arm over his belly protectively, Yosuke emphasizes with a tightened voice, ‘the babies will be fine.’

‘Yosuke….I…’

 _...mean well._

Seta Souji could not find the words to continue as Yosuke’s tears falls. 

‘...the babies…’ The brunette takes a deep breath, his voice breaking as he repeats what was said. ‘are...fine..’ 

If this’s in his office and his patient is someone he doesn’t know, his answer would be quick and swift. However, change the location to his living room and the ‘patient’ to his mate, his babies…..Souji is not sure. 

It doesn’t take a genius to know they most likely have to let the babies go. If not, Yosuke wouldn’t see the need to lie to protect them, so insistent they are healthy.

_The babies may be fine but you may not._

The brunette’s lies are too obvious. 

_Will you die?_

But Souji did not ask. 

Slumping back into the chair, Souji bit his lips and looks away. He cannot bear the thought of Yosuke choosing the babies over his own life. Does he not get a say in this? 

As the hot drinks turn cold and the clock struck the middle, Yosuke stood up from the silent confrontation.

‘I’m going to rest first.’ 

But Souji is faster and he grabs the other’s arm when Yosuke passes him for their room. Souji takes a moment to rub Yosuke’s arm affectionately before finding his words.

‘Yeah...go ahead and rest. I’ll join you after a bath.’

Squeezing his hand back, Yosuke at last smiles at him. Weakly and tired. 

The bath turns into a 1 hour stare at the black and white photo. On it are 2 things looking like beans and these beans are going to sprout, grow a head, a body, legs that might kick Yosuke from the inside and tiny fingers that might grab his pinky as he hold them in his arms for the first time.

Or they might not grow at all and they have to face a decision soon. Give up on the babies and risk leaving a mental scar on Yosuke. Or keep the babies and risk endangering Yosuke’s life. Either way, he’s going to hurt the Mother.

‘Yosuke...’

His focus on the photo blurs a little as Souji chokes on the emotions crashing down on him. He tries to wipe the tears off with a finger, which quickly turns into more with each swipe. 

‘Why...’ 

These two could grow up to be beautiful children. His and Yosuke’s beautiful children.

 _It’s so unfair._

And what’s worse? He’s supposed to choose? 

It is truly unfair. 

Yosuke will forever be his most treasured but how is he to choose... To take the lives of their children, their rights to live. They don’t even know what’s like to breathe, to feel the warmth of their parents...

As Souji is crushed under the weight of his choices, the familiar of Yosuke’s shampoo enters his personal space. It is followed by a kiss on the back of his head and then a chin rested on his head. Heavily. 

‘Everything’s going to be alright, Souji.’ 

_No. no. It isn’t._

Squeezing his eyes tightly shut, Souji ravishes in the warmth of Yosuke’s arms wrapping around him firmly. 

‘It’s alright. You don’t have to choose. No one should be made to choose who gets to live and who doesn’t. I’m not going to make you because I know the feeling best.’

_No._

Seeing Souji’s attempt to shake his head before it comes, Yosuke pulls the other back and has him lean back into his embrace. A second kiss is planted on his head as Yosuke’s way of appeasing the pain Souji is currently experiencing. 

‘I’m sorry it hurts you. I didn’t mean it but we’re not choosing. We’re going to let nature take its natural course, okay?’

And risk losing either or both. Yosuke isn’t stupid, he knows.

‘Hey, I’m both Alpha and Omega. I’m stronger than you when I have the best traits of both.’

Yosuke has to stay strong, for both of them and he begins to rock the big baby in his arms. 

‘Come on, Daddy. Mummy is tired. Let’s sleep already.’ 

The odds are stacking too high for Souji to agree and ends the conversation just there but the ache in Souji’s throat prevents him from speaking.

‘There’s a lot to do tomorrow. Like going for a date. To the park. To our usual cafe. Everything.’

Placing his head and weight on the taller guy, Yosuke too relishes in Souji’s sorrowful scent. Not in the anguish but the fact Souji cares. Yosuke is lying if he says he’s not afraid. The only reason he can face these is because Souji cares and he knows his Alpha will always be here for them.

‘We’ll be fine.’

Emotions run high when Yosuke’s around.

Logics meet their limits when Yosuke’s involved. 

And when Yosuke’s the only thing in his heart and mind, what’s left for Souji is a touch of blinded faith, irrational trust in the brunette to stay true to his words.

That his Yosuke and his children will be fine...

_Fin_

**Author's Note:**

> Those babies are not dying. And neither will Yosuke. I won’t allow it as I like happy ending. You can imagine a family of 4 with 2 doting parents, Souji especially. 
> 
> Quite the heavy topic of 'do I have the rights to choose someone's life or death for them' with Yosuke revealing his pain in the first chapter and so to end the series, I have decided it is only right for Souji to experience the same, while inputting the risks and dangers of both pregnancy and abortion (brushing the surfae). 
> 
> And once again, thank you so much for reading. I like this series a lot.


End file.
